Saturday, June 10, 2017

life sux at 17

im 17 now and yes i still hate typing with a passion

Wednesday, February 1, 2017

2017777777777777777777777777777777777

BOI ITS 2017 AND I'M BACK WITH A BROKEN KEYBOARD AND ITS LITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

LEMME TELL YOU: I GOT FOOD POISONING, A HOT NEW DUDE, NEW CLOTHES, AND THE SAME OL ME!

IM SO HAPPY DUDE!!! YAY

Friday, August 26, 2016

Kiss It Better

Dear friends,

I believe i'm overwhelmed with so many things right now. Not even in a bad way. Its mostly because of boys. Yes, boys. I'm single now and I have spoken to and met so many boys and girls. I'm confused on how I feel. A boy could be cute but is he going to waste my time? A girl could be beautiful but am I ready to really date a girl? There is this one guy, he doesn't go to school with me but I talked to him all summer. I have this sort of feeling for him. We haven't spoken in about a week and I don't if he has moved on or if he feels the same way I feel right now. It can't be in love, just can't. I'm not ready to love anytime soon.

Here's my dream situation as a teen girl right now: a guy that is just funny and unique. Actually has a personality (my last boyfriend made watching paint dry look fun) and someone who isn't afraid to talk about things on their mind. Someone that isn't happy all the time and I could help them and vice versa. Someone that can just be themselves around me. Most importantly, someone that just think of me as just a female body and an actual girl with feelings. Someone that will respect me and not lie to me. I'd love a boyfriend/girlfriend that will kind of be like my best friend too.

*sigh*

Hey, a girl could dream. I mean, what girl my age doesn't have these feelings. Its natural! I mean, I think what society has screwed up is what a teenage girl is. Unless you are or have been a teenage girl, you have NOOOO clue what's its like. And even if you were a teenage girl once, you have no right to tell how they should feel right now because not every teenage girl is the same. We could do the same things but we all don't live the same lives.

I hate how parents think that their daughters shouldn't hang out with boys because they are obviously going to have sex. Sex isn't a big thing. Either you want to or not. Personally, i'm not interested in sex at all. I mean, I like to actually get to know a person. And I know not everyone is like me but you shouldn't deny that there are probably other teens that feel the same way. Instead of keeping girls away from boys and have them go to college with no idea how to even talk to a boy, teach boys how to treat a girl right. Like its not okay for them to sleep around and just be called "boys being boys." Because if a girl slept around, she'd be called a slut or whore. That's another thing, people need to stop worrying about other people's business. Slut-shaming is something that has gotten out of hand. A woman could sleep around and still have plenty of confidence. If a woman sleeping around bothers you, you should get a life.

done for tonight.

love

Jade xoxox


Sunday, August 14, 2016

born Again

I'm back after a bit of a break. I thought about it and during the summer time, I didn't really have anything to talk about so I decided to wait til school started again to start writing again. So here I am, a week into the school year. The week wasn't ultra exciting nor ultra boring. It was just like any other school week: you wake up early, go to classes, come home. Maybe it's because i'm not as social as I used to be. This summer taught me to be more independent when it comes to having friends. I don't want to keep trying seek out people that have the same music taste as me. Yes, you listen to The 1975, that's cool. I can't build a friendship off of that.

I guess you can say i'm bit of a loner. I don't talk to anyone, usually just keep to myself. I eat alone at lunch, walk to classes alone, sit alone on class. It's not a bad thing at all, it's actually great because everything is going at my own pace and I don't have to wait up for people. Maybe Junior year will just be my loner year.

Another thing is I see a good friend of mine going into a stupid, pointless relationship. I mean, the guy is a total loser compared to how great my friend is. He only wants her for her body and I know it for a fact. My friend tends to date losers and i do not know why. I tried telling her that she's wasting her time with that guy of course, like any other love struck teenage girl, she won't listen. So i've decided to just let her do her own damage. I feel she has to get hurt in this situation to learn from her mistake. Is that a good thing to do as a friend is my question?

Time can only tell

-Jade xx

Sunday, July 17, 2016

smile

Forgive me blog for I have sinned.

 It's been one too many days since I have blogged.

Honestly, I haven't been inspired to write something. I mean, I went to this party the other day and it just felt like a big waste. To a point. I left early and went home. It felt so great to be home. Sometimes its just too much for me to be around too many people. Other people probably feel that way too.

Anyway, I feel pretty hopeful about school this year. These next two years, I just want to focus on my future, no matter how corny it sounds and stuff. Really hoping I get some scholarships :))) (fingers crossed)

-Jade xx

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Yay!

I had fun today. I don't think I have much to say because today seemed pretty short. I woke up, lingered around the house for a few hours, went out to go play Pokemon Go (which has been the craze in the world). I'm starting to feel pretty good about having no friends. I feel as if I cleaned out my closet and I can buy new clothes now. The things in the closet being the old "friends" and the new clothes being just..anything new. I don't care if no one responds to my text anymore. I don't care if people don't notice me. I notice me and that's all that matters. 

-Jade xx

Monday, July 11, 2016

Welp

At the moment, i'm in the pits of realizing I really don't have any friends. The people I thought that were there for me treat me like i'm just a casual school friend when I thought I had just begun some life-long friendships. It was all fake, a sham. This entire summer, I've been lingering around trying to talk and hang out with people that don't care about my well-being.

I'm the kind of person that try to make people feel better and just be the best friend I can be. Like, who wouldn't want that? I'm not trying to say i'm perfect but I try my very best. I always do, with everything I do. People come to me with their problems and I try to work it out the best I can. They end up feeling better, and saying thank you. Newsflash, everyone: As many times as CareerCrusing has said it, i'm not a counselor. Yes, I try to help you out as much as I can BUT I AM HUMAN, ITS ONLY CONSIDERATE. Yes, I admit, sometimes I just wanna tell people, "I don't care about your problems, I've got enough of those myself."

I admit, I sometimes I put people's emotions above mine. I need to stop doing that. I matter so much more. Because at the end of the day, I have myself, the greatest friend I've had since day one. Do people ever ask me how i'm doing? No. How my day has been? No. How's life, doing alright? No. Wanna get some lunch and hang? Nope. Mind you, these are the same people that are spilling their everlasting emotions and secrets to me. I don't get it, do I come off as a caring person? Because in reality, unless you are my family, I don't care about you. I mean, do you care that I feel lonely in these last two years of high school? Nope.

These last two years of high school are going to be dedicated to one person: me. I'm going to experience high school with my lens, I don't need baggage friends that are empty. I'm going to go to homecoming and prom even if I don't have a date. I'm going to go to football games. I'm going to participate in clubs for me. I want the best for me. Hell, i'm taking the SAT soon! As a Junior! I'm ahead of these fake losers! Soon, I'll apply for colleges and i'll be miles above of you fakes!


I will be the greatest I can be.
I already have a great start.

-Jade xx